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1---
2title: I want to say
3id: i-want-to-say
4genre: verse
5
6project:
7 title: Autocento of the breakfast table
8 class: autocento
9...
10
11I want to say I take it all back \
12I want \
13I want to take it back I want it none of it \
14to be ever have happened not \
15when I saw you step over the rope \
16when we went to New York for a week \
17but stayed upstate when you punched me \
18hard in the solar plexus in Prague \
19when I looked in your face and [saw myself][] \
20looking back smiling when we went on another trip \
21and another all the trips I want to have \
22stayed home I want to have seen the clouds \
23drifting past [my car window][] to have listened \
24to that sound the bridge makes driving over it \
25without thinking of you always it was you
26
27I want
28
29I [want to be fresh][] I want to roll out of bed \
30as though it were my [first morning in a new state][] \
31I want nothing more than absolution of sins \
32[a negation but there is no way to subtract here][] \
33I cannot remove this growth that appeared \
34seemingly overnight I cannot [cut you away from myself][] \
35I cannot forget what has already and will always have been \
36I cannot get out of a [new bed][] ever \
37New York will always be as it was when I saw it first \
38with you my breathing will always be labored outside \
39of the cafe I will always see you when [I look in a mirror][] \
40of someone's face the reflection of missed thoughts missed \
41[words will cease to give meaning][] the center will come out \
42of me I will make a new center yes I will drag what is \
43your center around with me and [repeat and repeat][] again \
44I cannot want cannot want want not
45
46[new bed]: in-bed.html
47[saw myself]: deathstrumpet.html
48[my car window]: boy_bus.html
49[want to be fresh]: plant.html
50[first morning in a new state]: collage-instrument.html
51[a negation but there is no way to subtract here]: no-nothing.html
52[cut you away from myself]: elegyforanalternateself.html
53[I look in a mirror]: lovesong.html
54[words will cease to give meaning]: words-meaning.html
55[repeat and repeat]: question.html