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authorCase Duckworth2015-04-01 16:29:46 -0700
committerCase Duckworth2015-04-01 16:29:46 -0700
commit61baf210a9d0d4fffcd82751ba3419dd2feb349d (patch)
tree577fe121f035854399f820c420eca38b60879156 /.comments
parentAdd Abstract and Process Narrative (diff)
downloadautocento-61baf210a9d0d4fffcd82751ba3419dd2feb349d.tar.gz
autocento-61baf210a9d0d4fffcd82751ba3419dd2feb349d.zip
Revise a few poems in Elegies
Also add a .gitignore.  How is this so late?
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1I have been reading your "autocento" for many days now and have delights and frustrations to report. As for delights, the "articles" themselves are generally engaging, enlightening and challenging and indicative of the poet's capacious imagination and broad range of knowledge and interests from the esoteric to the quotidian. The autocento as an object itself is fun to play as the reader explores an infinite number of combinations and connections. Just as themes and motifs start to cohere-- the moon, mirroring, death, the sea, love, modes of communication-- they just as quickly effervesce as another link takes us along another twisted path. That quality is a strength, but it is also a drawback, I fear. At times I feel like I was lost in a Borgesian library of everything with no escape in sight. This was not an altogether pleasant sensation. I'm not necessarily arguing for changing anything, but I would like the project at some point to be more clear about itself and what it expects of the reader. Even though you do assert the loosey-goosey nature of the thing, readers expect to feel like they are making progress, that there is a finish to a project, an end point of some sort. I was interested in the way that your project fundamentally questions the beginning-middle-end assumptions that are traditionally brought to bear upon literary productions of all kinds, but I wanted the text itself to be aware of the ultimate tediousness that comes from infinite possibilities due to lack of authorial or editorial selection. Alternatively, a table of contents that actually looks like and functions like a table of contents (i.e. these are the titles of the things you will find in this book) might be reassuring. After awhile, after reading for many days, I became weary of finding a new "article." I wanted the comfort of a controlling consciousness, not more manifestations of "what my head looks like on the inside" that exist outside of a compelling argument regarding why that is a worthwhile pursuit for the reader ad infinitum. You need a site map!!!
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1Case
2Intro define n-gram
3
4+++
5We float on an ocean of language which we did nothing to create, and the best we can hope for is to find some combination that hasn’t been thought of too many times before. As Solomon said, “There is nothing new under the sun.”
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7work remains to be done for me to consider it fully “published” (what does this word mean in 2015?
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9I love Treatise
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11Cool: A poem is like a snapshot of a self. If it’s any good, it captures the emotional core of the self at the time of writing for communication with future selves, either within the same person or outside of it. Thus revision is possible, and the new poem created will be yet another snapshot of the future self as changed by the original poem. The page becomes a window into the past, a particular past as experienced by one self. The poem is a remembering of a self that no longer exists, in other words, an elegy.
12---
13Is your project related to Julia Kristeva's work on intertextuality?
14
15Autocento of the breakfast table works within the tension caused by these two concepts. Which two concepts? I don't see tension between the concepts. I see complicity as the n-gram can be constantly made available as fodder for the cento, right?
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17This should give the reader a fair idea of what my head looks like on the inside. Perhaps you should explain why readers might want to do this. What is the value of being inside your head? Could it perhaps help us to understand other heads?
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19So then, extending your argument, all written text is cento? How is your argument not obvious, just a restatement of the way of things, the way we use extant words to create meaning?
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21Define "article" in the text the first time you use it. I'm growing weary of seeing crucial information footnoted as if this is clever.
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23Could "article" become "item" as there is already a written thing known as "Article"
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25The project in many ways is more interesting than your intro to it. What can you say about how playing the piece affects the meaning of the articles? Does the project force readers to construct cento are the poems ever finished (by reader not ever making it to the end or, alternatively, failing to make the article new by riding a link to another article?)
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27Perhaps provide some sense of how many articles the reader can encounter. Alternatively, make it clear that the project will never finish and that this is purposeful and consistent will your underlying theory of text generation.
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29Riptide of Memory "laying" is "lying"
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31The person I am beginning a poem is a separate being than the one I am finishing a poem, and part of it is the poem I’ve written has brought forth some other dish onto the great table that is myself. Good idea. Revise sentence.
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33In the same way, with each poem you read of this, you too could become a different person. Cf Donald Barthelme, "After Joyce"
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35I think writing is a communication of the self, and I think this is the best way to communicate mine in all its multiversity. REVISE out the "I think"
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37We Played Those Games Too-- other's'. Chords = cords (vocal cords)
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39To Daniel. You want padawan? I've never seen the point of Jessica Alba either
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41I like Death's Trumpet & the epigraph
42
43Love it in Spittle: I want to kiss the world to make it mine. I want to become
44a Judas to reality, betray it with the wetness of emotion.
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46Love Song is wonderful! " There is no art because there is no mirror big enough."
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48"Ronald McDonald" seems to undercut your premise of the constantly mutable self
49
50Shipwright-- I appreciate the maturity of this poem, the range of references displays in a short poem
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52Apollo 11 poem blew me away!
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54Ars poetica. Poetry as crime is nice, but the piece could be more elegant & cohesive-- seawater, bullion, soup, vanilla. The reader/they
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56I wonder how Problems and Liking Things would play without the context of this collection-- boring? Unearned? Words to live by: By making dick moves, you can overcome what may be the biggest evil on this earth: Happy-Hungering.
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5816th Chapel. Change to "for whom I know he'll buy a Rolls"
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60Riptide of Memory "laying" is "lying"
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62OUROBOROS OF MEMORY. They seem to HAVE forgotten
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64My reading: after awhile there's so much of it that none of it has meaning-- is this intended?