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1 | --- | ||
2 | title: 'The purpose of dogs' | ||
3 | project: 'Book of Hezekiah' | ||
4 | project-order: 2 | ||
5 | project-prev: 'prelude.html' | ||
6 | project-next: 'philosophy.html' | ||
7 | genre: 'prose' | ||
8 | ... | ||
9 | |||
10 | Okay, so as we said in [the Prelude][], there either is or isn't a God. This | ||
11 | has been one of the main past times of humanity, ever since ... since the | ||
12 | first man (or woman) climbed out of whatever slime or swamp he thumbed his way | ||
13 | out of. What humanity has failed to realize is that an incredibly plausible | ||
14 | third, and heretofore unknown, hypothesis also exists: There is a dog. | ||
15 | |||
16 | In fact, there are many dogs, and not only that. There are also many types of | ||
17 | dogs; these are called breeds, and each breed was created by man in order to | ||
18 | fulfill some use that man thought he needed. Some dogs are for chasing birds, | ||
19 | and some are for chasing badgers. Some are for laying in your lap and being | ||
20 | petted all day. Some dogs don't seem to be really for anything, besides being | ||
21 | fucking stupid and chewing up your one-of-a-kind collectible | ||
22 | individually-numbered King Kong figurine from the Peter Jackson film. But the | ||
23 | important thing is, (and here we go with important things again) all dogs have | ||
24 | been bred by people for performing some certain function that we think is | ||
25 | important. | ||
26 | |||
27 | Note: *Just because we think it's important doesn't mean it is | ||
28 | important.* But it might as well be, because what we as humans think is | ||
29 | important is important. But be careful! just because something's important | ||
30 | doesn't mean it means anything, or that it actually makes anything happen. | ||
31 | Even though just because something makes something else happen doesn't mean | ||
32 | it's important. [Shit][]. Let me start again. | ||
33 | |||
34 | [the Prelude]: prelude.html | ||
35 | [Shit]: feedingtheraven.html | ||