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---
title: Exasperated
genre: verse
project:
title: Stark Raving
css: stark
order: 8
next:
- title: The Death Zone
link: death-zone
- title: Boy on the bus
link: boy_bus
prev:
- title: AMBER alert
link: amber-alert
- title: The Death Zone
link: death-zone
...
I didn't write this sestina yesterday. \
It's the first time I fell behind in my task \
and hopefully, the only time it will. \
This means that today I must write two \
sestinas. If I don't write them today, I \
will have to write two later down the line.
Although I feel I'm slogging through each line \
I think I'm doing better every day, \
though maybe this is wishful thinking: I \
showed my friend my just-completed task \
two days ago (my God, was it two \
entire days? I've no idea what I'll
do [after thirty-nine days][]. I think I'll \
feel like [Inigo Montoya][], who'd been in the line \
of revenging for so long, he didn't know what to \
do with the rest of his life), and he deigned \
to be polite, but I could tell the task \
was hard for him. He told me finally that I
had made a noble effort, but that ultimately I \
failed. [So my question][]: when will \
I be a decent sestina writer? For this is my task. \
Maybe if I just keep cranking out line after line \
I'll finally figure it out. Maybe one more day \
or another week will do it, or maybe I'll need two,
or maybe it'll never happen. Maybe a sestina's too \
involved, too much [weaving][] of words too fine, and I \
will never write a good one, even on my best day, \
even if I employ all my skill and all my will. \
I'm not used to writing poems with thirty-nine lines, \
that must be the problem, must be why this task
is Herculean. He only had to finish twelve tasks, \
and I have one less one thousand, five hundred twenty-two, \
and it's nothing but complaining lines \
about [how hard it is to be a person][]. I \
am getting sick of myself with these poems, and will \
soon be loathe to get out of bed every day.
But I tasked myself with this, which may be the worst I \
ever do to myself. I thought a poem NaNoWriMo would \
be fun, would line my resume, give me something I could publish someday.
[after thirty-nine days]: http://biblehub.com/2_corinthians/11-24.htm
[Inigo Montoya]: death-zone.html
[So my question]: question.html
[weaving]: tapestry.html
[how hard it is to be a person]: deathstrumpet.html
|
