1 files changed, 0 insertions, 63 deletions
diff --git a/movingsideways.txt b/movingsideways.txt
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---
-title: Moving Sideways
-genre: prose
-project:
-    title: Book of Hezekiah
-    css: hezekiah
-    order: 5
-    next:
-        title: Problems
-        link: problems
-    prev:
-        title: Proverbs
-        link: proverbs
-...
-A dog moving sideways is sick; a man moving sideways is drunk.  Thus if
-you want to be mindful of the movings of the universe sideways, become
-either drunk or sick.  By doing this you remove yourself from the
-equation, and are able to observe, without being observed, the universe
-as it dances sideways drunkenly.
-Shit wait.  The problem is not that by observing you are observed
-(although quantum mechanics may disagree[^1]), because obviously dogs
-don't know we're observing them when we watch them through cameras in
-their little yard while they play and eat and poop---who poops knowingly
-on camera?  The problem is *the actual act of observing that distorts the
-world into what we want it to be*.
-What I want to know is this: Why is this necessarily a problem?  The dog
-is made, by mankind, to frolic and poop and sniff and growl and dig.  Why
-cannot the man be made to observe the world incorrectly around him, and
-worry about it?  Men have always wandered about the earth; does it not
-make sense that also they should wonder in their minds what makes it all
-work?[^2] In fact this is the very center of the creative being: the
-ability to move sideways, to dance with reality and judge it as it
-judges you, much like teenagers at the junior prom.
-Of course, reality doesn't judge us back.  But that doesn't mean that it
-doesn't!  If you think it's judging you, then *observe in your
-surroundings your own insecurities*.  It is obvious that this way of
-doing things is far from vogue; usually projecting [inner pain][] onto the
-outer world is classified as pathology.  However, this is because it is
-assumed that the outer world is *on its own terms*, which it obviously
-isn't, as far as we know.  It follows that as [there is no backdrop][backdrop]
-against which to judge our quirks, the quirks must not exist.  Thus all
-is right with the world.
-[inner pain]: telemarketer.html
-[backdrop]: philosophy.html
-[^1]: Quantum mechanics, as is well known, are the most hornery and
-    least agreeable of all mechanics.  The cost to get one quantum
-    serviced is usually at least eight times more expensive than the
-    cost of an average automobile tune-up, for reasons not clearly
-    known.  The quantum mechanics themselves claim it's the smallness of
-    their work that justifies the price, but it doesn't really look like
-    they're doing anything, and besides, my quantum always seems to
-    break again within six months---maybe I'm just driving it too hard.
-[^2]: I attempted to strike this terrible pun from the account, but
-    Hezekiah demanded I keep it if he were to continue the relation of
-    his prophecy-slash-advice column

diff --git a/movingsideways.txt b/movingsideways.txt deleted file mode 100644 index bc373e2..0000000 --- a/movingsideways.txt +++ /dev/null
@@ -1,63 +0,0 @@
1	---
2	title: Moving Sideways
3	genre: prose
4
5	project:
6	title: Book of Hezekiah
7	css: hezekiah
8	order: 5
9	next:
10	title: Problems
11	link: problems
12	prev:
13	title: Proverbs
14	link: proverbs
15	...
16
17	A dog moving sideways is sick; a man moving sideways is drunk. Thus if
18	you want to be mindful of the movings of the universe sideways, become
19	either drunk or sick. By doing this you remove yourself from the
20	equation, and are able to observe, without being observed, the universe
21	as it dances sideways drunkenly.
22
23	Shit wait. The problem is not that by observing you are observed
24	(although quantum mechanics may disagree[^1]), because obviously dogs
25	don't know we're observing them when we watch them through cameras in
26	their little yard while they play and eat and poop---who poops knowingly
27	on camera? The problem is *the actual act of observing that distorts the
28	world into what we want it to be*.
29
30	What I want to know is this: Why is this necessarily a problem? The dog
31	is made, by mankind, to frolic and poop and sniff and growl and dig. Why
32	cannot the man be made to observe the world incorrectly around him, and
33	worry about it? Men have always wandered about the earth; does it not
34	make sense that also they should wonder in their minds what makes it all
35	work?[^2] In fact this is the very center of the creative being: the
36	ability to move sideways, to dance with reality and judge it as it
37	judges you, much like teenagers at the junior prom.
38
39	Of course, reality doesn't judge us back. But that doesn't mean that it
40	doesn't! If you think it's judging you, then *observe in your
41	surroundings your own insecurities*. It is obvious that this way of
42	doing things is far from vogue; usually projecting [inner pain][] onto the
43	outer world is classified as pathology. However, this is because it is
44	assumed that the outer world is on its own terms, which it obviously
45	isn't, as far as we know. It follows that as [there is no backdrop][backdrop]
46	against which to judge our quirks, the quirks must not exist. Thus all
47	is right with the world.
48
49	[inner pain]: telemarketer.html
50	[backdrop]: philosophy.html
51
52	[^1]: Quantum mechanics, as is well known, are the most hornery and
53	least agreeable of all mechanics. The cost to get one quantum
54	serviced is usually at least eight times more expensive than the
55	cost of an average automobile tune-up, for reasons not clearly
56	known. The quantum mechanics themselves claim it's the smallness of
57	their work that justifies the price, but it doesn't really look like
58	they're doing anything, and besides, my quantum always seems to
59	break again within six months---maybe I'm just driving it too hard.
60
61	[^2]: I attempted to strike this terrible pun from the account, but
62	Hezekiah demanded I keep it if he were to continue the relation of
63	his prophecy-slash-advice column