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+---
+title: In bed
+genre: verse
+
+project:
+    title: Autocento of the breakfast table
+    css: autocento
+...
+
+## I
+
+I hear [the rats][] run \
+in the walls like water \
+through a tree.  My blood
+
+thickens.  As I dream \
+the masturbation dream \
+the shelf above my bed
+
+falls covering me in \
+dirt and decaying beetles.  \
+[I see my reflection is headless][].
+
+## II
+
+When the waves stop \
+[and the moon grins down][] \
+to overtake me: the car
+
+ran up the street that night \
+when you were nearly \
+molested in your neighbor's house:
+
+is this why we don't have \
+neighbors?  For this the trees \
+[rot only for us][]?
+
+## III
+
+I woke screaming and you \
+came to sit next to me.  I felt \
+my eyes were open too wide
+
+that I could not shut them \
+from the horror movie sitting \
+on your lap in the easy chair
+
+in the dream the other dream \
+in the living room under \
+the tree.  Why do I feel guilty?
+
+
+## IV
+
+I wake up in a pool of water \
+[closed over me like an eyelid][].  \
+There is no longer comfort
+
+in staring at the ceiling.  \
+Its pitch blackness beckons \
+into a future of blankness.
+
+My body lay still quaking.  \
+My mind is chained fast \
+to the beating of my heart.
+
+## V
+
+I sit up slowly creaking.  \
+I find myself alone buried \
+[in an ocean][].  Far off
+
+[there is an eagle][] flying \
+toward me.  She lands on \
+my knee and lays an egg.
+
+I think *not this again* \
+something I've never \
+thought in my life.
+
+## VI
+
+I think *not this again* \
+something I've never \
+thought in my life.  Not
+
+after losing my car keys \
+in the easy chair.  Not after \
+scratching myself on a branch.
+
+Not after finding the thing \
+in your dresser drawer that \
+night.  [I remember you suddenly.][]
+
+
+## VII
+
+[You run through me \
+like rats][rats] down an alley. \
+You are in my [blood][].
+
+You scared me once \
+remember?  Jumped out \
+of the bathroom door.
+
+I fell screaming onto \
+the linoleum.  Did you \
+apologize?  Did you need to?
+
+## VIII
+
+The ocean that surrounds me \
+creaks like a rocking \
+cradle.  Your face bright
+
+as the moon at eclipse \
+and as [red][].  Low song \
+my tide stretching
+
+to the horizon.  Ripples \
+on the surface belie \
+something bigger beneath.
+
+## IX
+
+In bed I am alone for \
+the only time.  In bed \
+I am a grown man.
+
+Below the blankets I \
+know you for who you are.  \
+In bed [I see your face][]
+
+pressed against the window.  \
+I look out and see you \
+and I am not afraid.
+
+[the rats]: last-bastion.html
+[I see my reflection is headless]: deathstrumpet.html
+[and the moon grins down]: moon-drowning.html
+[rot only for us]: options.html
+[closed over me like an eyelid]: theoceanoverflowswithcamels.html
+[in an ocean]: the-sea_the-beach.html
+[there is an eagle]: mountain.html
+[I remember you suddenly.]: ouroboros_memory.html
+[rats]: #I
+[blood]: plant.html
+[red]: window.html
+[I see your face]: boy_bus.html