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---
title: 'I am'
project: 'Elegies for Alternate Selves'
project-order: 21
genre: 'verse'
...
I am a great pillar of [white smoke][]. \
I am Lot's nameless wife encased in salt. \
I am the wound on Christ's back as he moans \
with the pounding of a hammer on his wrist. \
I am the nail that holds my house together. \
It is a strong house, built on a good foundation. \
In the winter, it is warm and crawling things \
cannot get in. This house will never burn down. \
It is the house that I built, with my body \
and with my strength. I am the only one who lives \
here. I am both father and mother to a race \
of dust motes that worship me as a god. I have \
monuments built daily in my honor in dark \
corners around the house. I destroy all of them \
before I go to bed, but in the morning \
there are still more. I don't think I know \
where all of them are. I [don't think][not think] I can get \
to all of them anymore. There are too many.
[white smoke]: deathstrumpet.html
[not think]: howithappened.html
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