in-bed.html


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<h1 class="title">In bed</h1>


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<section class="content verse">
<section id="i" class="level2">
<h2>I</h2>
<p><span class="line">I hear <a href="last-bastion.html">the rats</a> run</span><span class="line">in the walls like water</span><span class="line">through a tree. My blood</span></p>
<p><span class="line">thickens. As I dream</span><span class="line">the masturbation dream</span><span class="line">the shelf above my bed</span></p>
<p><span class="line">falls covering me in</span><span class="line">dirt and decaying beetles.</span><span class="line"><a href="deathstrumpet.html">I see my reflection is headless</a>.</span></p>
</section>
<section id="ii" class="level2">
<h2>II</h2>
<p><span class="line">When the waves stop</span><span class="line"><a href="moon-drowning.html">and the moon grins down</a></span><span class="line">to overtake me: the car</span></p>
<p><span class="line">ran up the street that night</span><span class="line">when you were nearly</span><span class="line">molested in your neighbor’s house:</span></p>
<p><span class="line">is this why we don’t have</span><span class="line">neighbors? For this the trees</span><span class="line"><a href="options.html">rot only for us</a>?</span></p>
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<section id="iii" class="level2">
<h2>III</h2>
<p><span class="line">I woke screaming and you</span><span class="line">came to sit next to me. I felt</span><span class="line">my eyes were open too wide</span></p>
<p><span class="line">that I could not shut them</span><span class="line">from the horror movie sitting</span><span class="line">on your lap in the easy chair</span></p>
<p><span class="line">in the dream the other dream</span><span class="line">in the living room under</span><span class="line">the tree. Why do I feel guilty?</span></p>
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<section id="iv" class="level2">
<h2>IV</h2>
<p><span class="line">I wake up in a pool of water</span><span class="line"><a href="theoceanoverflowswithcamels.html">closed over me like an eyelid</a>.</span><span class="line">There is no longer comfort</span></p>
<p><span class="line">in staring at the ceiling.</span><span class="line">Its pitch blackness beckons</span><span class="line">into a future of blankness.</span></p>
<p><span class="line">My body lay still quaking.</span><span class="line">My mind is chained fast</span><span class="line">to the beating of my heart.</span></p>
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<section id="v" class="level2">
<h2>V</h2>
<p><span class="line">I sit up slowly creaking.</span><span class="line">I find myself alone buried</span><span class="line"><a href="the-sea_the-beach.html">in an ocean</a>. Far off</span></p>
<p><span class="line"><a href="mountain.html">there is an eagle</a> flying</span><span class="line">toward me. She lands on</span><span class="line">my knee and lays an egg.</span></p>
<p><span class="line">I think <em>not this again</em></span><span class="line">something I’ve never</span><span class="line">thought in my life.</span></p>
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<section id="vi" class="level2">
<h2>VI</h2>
<p><span class="line">I think <em>not this again</em></span><span class="line">something I’ve never</span><span class="line">thought in my life. Not</span></p>
<p><span class="line">after losing my car keys</span><span class="line">in the easy chair. Not after</span><span class="line">scratching myself on a branch.</span></p>
<p><span class="line">Not after finding the thing</span><span class="line">in your dresser drawer that</span><span class="line">night. <a href="ouroboros_memory.html">I remember you suddenly.</a></span></p>
</section>
<section id="vii" class="level2">
<h2>VII</h2>
<p><span class="line">[You run through me</span><span class="line">like rats]<a href="#I">rats</a> down an alley.</span><span class="line">You are in my <a href="plant.html">blood</a>.</span></p>
<p><span class="line">You scared me once</span><span class="line">remember? Jumped out</span><span class="line">of the bathroom door.</span></p>
<p><span class="line">I fell screaming onto</span><span class="line">the linoleum. Did you</span><span class="line">apologize? Did you need to?</span></p>
</section>
<section id="viii" class="level2">
<h2>VIII</h2>
<p><span class="line">The ocean that surrounds me</span><span class="line">creaks like a rocking</span><span class="line">cradle. Your face bright</span></p>
<p><span class="line">as the moon at eclipse</span><span class="line">and as <a href="window.html">red</a>. Low song</span><span class="line">my tide stretching</span></p>
<p><span class="line">to the horizon. Ripples</span><span class="line">on the surface belie</span><span class="line">something bigger beneath.</span></p>
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<section id="ix" class="level2">
<h2>IX</h2>
<p><span class="line">In bed I am alone for</span><span class="line">the only time. In bed</span><span class="line">I am a grown man.</span></p>
<p><span class="line">Below the blankets I</span><span class="line">know you for who you are.</span><span class="line">In bed I see your face</span></p>
<p><span class="line">pressed against the window.</span><span class="line">I look out and see you</span><span class="line">and I am not afraid.</span></p>
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