Revise after thesis defense

6 files changed, 18 insertions, 16 deletions

@@ -49,7 +49,7 @@
 </section>
 <section id="iii" class="level2">
 <h2>III</h2>
-<p><span class="line">I woke screaming and you</span><span class="line">came to sit next to me. I felt</span><span class="line">my eyes were open too wide</span></p>
+<p><span class="line">I <a href="worse-looking-over.html">woke screaming</a> and you</span><span class="line">came to sit next to me. I felt</span><span class="line">my eyes were open too wide</span></p>
 <p><span class="line">that I could not shut them</span><span class="line">from the horror movie sitting</span><span class="line">on your lap in the easy chair</span></p>
 <p><span class="line">in the dream the other dream</span><span class="line">in the living room under</span><span class="line">the tree. Why do I feel guilty?</span></p>
 </section>
@@ -62,7 +62,7 @@
 <section id="v" class="level2">
 <h2>V</h2>
 <p><span class="line">I sit up slowly creaking.</span><span class="line">I find myself alone buried</span><span class="line"><a href="the-sea_the-beach.html">in an ocean</a>. Far off</span></p>
-<p><span class="line"><a href="mountain.html">there is an eagle</a> flying</span><span class="line">toward me. She lands on</span><span class="line">my knee and lays an egg.</span></p>
+<p><span class="line"><a href="mountain.html">there is an eagle</a> flying</span><span class="line">toward me. She lands on</span><span class="line"><a href="http://www.sacred-texts.com/neu/kveng/kvrune01.htm">my knee and lays an egg</a>.</span></p>
 <p><span class="line">I think <em>not this again</em></span><span class="line">something I’ve never</span><span class="line">thought in my life.</span></p>
 </section>
 <section id="vi" class="level2">
@@ -73,7 +73,7 @@
 </section>
 <section id="vii" class="level2">
 <h2>VII</h2>
-<p><span class="line">[You run through me</span><span class="line">like rats]<a href="#I">rats</a> down an alley.</span><span class="line">You are in my <a href="plant.html">blood</a>.</span></p>
+<p><span class="line">You run through me</span><span class="line"><a href="#I">like rats</a> down an alley.</span><span class="line">You are in my <a href="plant.html">blood</a>.</span></p>
 <p><span class="line">You scared me once</span><span class="line">remember? Jumped out</span><span class="line">of the bathroom door.</span></p>
 <p><span class="line">I fell screaming onto</span><span class="line">the linoleum. Did you</span><span class="line">apologize? Did you need to?</span></p>
 </section>
@@ -37,10 +37,10 @@
 <section class="content verse">
 <p><span class="line">Inside of my memory, the poem is another memory.</span><span class="line">The air up here is thin, but the wind blows harder</span><span class="line">than anywhere else I know. It threatens to rip</span><span class="line">my body away, like <a href="angeltoabraham.html">an angel of death</a>, to the stars.</span></p>
 <p><span class="line">In Arizona, I thought I would forget the rain,</span><span class="line">forget its sound on a roof like a hard wind, forget</span><span class="line">its smell like a far away ocean. Luckily for me</span><span class="line">it rains here. Luckily, because I forget too easily.</span></p>
-<p><span class="line">In a dream, <a href="father.html">my father is caught by a riptide</a> off-shore.</span><span class="line">He’s pulled far out, far enough that the shoreline’s</span><span class="line">a line in his <a href="ouroboros_memory.html">memory</a> on the horizon. I can see him</span><span class="line">swimming, hand over hand, pulling his small weight</span></p>
+<p><span class="line">In a dream, <a href="father.html">my father is caught by a riptide</a> off-shore.</span><span class="line">He’s pulled far out, far enough that the shoreline’s</span><span class="line">a dim line in his <a href="ouroboros_memory.html">memory</a> on the horizon. I can see him</span><span class="line">swimming, hand over hand, pulling his small weight</span></p>
 <p><span class="line">back to land. I see him as <a href="shipwright.html">another shipwreck</a> victim,</span><span class="line">coughing sand and seawater, beard woven with seaweed.</span><span class="line">I see him lying there a long time. I see all this</span><span class="line">as he tells me the story, years later, the riptide</span></p>
 <p><span class="line">only a <a href="one-hundred-lines.html">ghost</a> in his memory, I only a child falling</span><span class="line">asleep. My mother’s making mayonnaise rolls</span><span class="line">in the kitchen, a recipe I’ll send for years later,</span><span class="line">in Arizona, in the monsoon season, when my thirst</span></p>
-<p><span class="line">pulls me back home, my memory’s lonesome twinkle</span><span class="line">like <a href="finding-the-lion.html">stars above the mountains</a>. I’ll send for it</span><span class="line">and try to make them, but in the thin air they’ll</span><span class="line">crumble into dust like desert air, like a memory.</span></p>
+<p><span class="line">pulls me back home, my memory’s lonesome twinkle</span><span class="line">like <a href="finding-the-lion.html">stars above the mountains</a>. I’ll send for it</span><span class="line">and try to make them, but at this altitude they’ll</span><span class="line">crumble into dust like desert air, like a memory.</span></p>
 </section>
 </article>
 
@@ -40,7 +40,7 @@ project:
 
 ## III
 
-| I woke screaming and you
+| I [woke screaming][] and you
 | came to sit next to me.  I felt
 | my eyes were open too wide
 
@@ -75,7 +75,7 @@ project:
 
 | [there is an eagle][] flying
 | toward me.  She lands on
-| my knee and lays an egg.
+| [my knee and lays an egg][].
 
 | I think *not this again*
 | something I've never
@@ -98,8 +98,8 @@ project:
 
 ## VII
 
-| [You run through me
-| like rats][rats] down an alley.
+| You run through me
+| [like rats][rats] down an alley.
 | You are in my [blood][].
 
 | You scared me once
@@ -142,6 +142,7 @@ project:
 [I see my reflection is headless]: deathstrumpet.html
 [and the moon grins down]: moon-drowning.html
 [rot only for us]: options.html
+[woke screaming]: worse-looking-over.html
 [closed over me like an eyelid]: theoceanoverflowswithcamels.html
 [in an ocean]: the-sea_the-beach.html
 [there is an eagle]: mountain.html
@@ -149,3 +150,4 @@ project:
 [rats]: #I
 [blood]: plant.html
 [red]: window.html
+[my knee and lays an egg]: http://www.sacred-texts.com/neu/kveng/kvrune01.htm
@@ -33,7 +33,7 @@ project:
 
 | In a dream, [my father is caught by a riptide][] off-shore.
 | He's pulled far out, far enough that the shoreline's
-| a line in his [memory][] on the horizon.  I can see him
+| a dim line in his [memory][] on the horizon.  I can see him
 | swimming, hand over hand, pulling his small weight
 
 | back to land.  I see him as [another shipwreck][] victim,
@@ -48,7 +48,7 @@ project:
 
 | pulls me back home, my memory's lonesome twinkle
 | like [stars above the mountains][].  I'll send for it
-| and try to make them, but in the thin air they'll
+| and try to make them, but at this altitude they'll
 | crumble into dust like desert air, like a memory.
 
 [an angel of death]: angeltoabraham.html
@@ -17,13 +17,13 @@ project:
 | in the dark, remember?  You told me time was
 
 | pregnant with all things.  I should've said
-| something, to draw you out from your place
+| something, to draw you out from your safety
 | in the dark.  Remember, you told me time was
 | only an illusion, [and memory was][] only
 
-| something to draw.  You, out from your place,
+| something to draw.  You, out from your safety,
 | I out from mine, that night, I believed in you.
-| Only illusion and memory were one, lying
+| And illusion and memory were one, lying
 | [down on your couch][], through the night you drew
 
 | me out from mine.  That night, I believed in you
@@ -36,8 +36,8 @@
 
 <section class="content verse">
 <p><span class="line">My head is <a href="found-typewriter-poem.html">full of fire</a>, my tongue swollen,</span><span class="line">pregnant with all the things I should’ve said</span><span class="line">but didn’t. Last night, we met each other</span><span class="line">in the dark, remember? You told me time was</span></p>
-<p><span class="line">pregnant with all things. I should’ve said</span><span class="line">something, to draw you out from your place</span><span class="line">in the dark. Remember, you told me time was</span><span class="line">only an illusion, <a href="riptide_memory.html">and memory was</a> only</span></p>
-<p><span class="line">something to draw. You, out from your place,</span><span class="line">I out from mine, that night, I believed in you.</span><span class="line">Only illusion and memory were one, lying</span><span class="line"><a href="early.html">down on your couch</a>, through the night you drew</span></p>
+<p><span class="line">pregnant with all things. I should’ve said</span><span class="line">something, to draw you out from your safety</span><span class="line">in the dark. Remember, you told me time was</span><span class="line">only an illusion, <a href="riptide_memory.html">and memory was</a> only</span></p>
+<p><span class="line">something to draw. You, out from your safety,</span><span class="line">I out from mine, that night, I believed in you.</span><span class="line">And illusion and memory were one, lying</span><span class="line"><a href="early.html">down on your couch</a>, through the night you drew</span></p>
 <p><span class="line">me out from mine. That night, I believed in you</span><span class="line">when you told me you loved me. I lay</span><span class="line">down on your couch. Through the night, you drew</span><span class="line">a picture of our <a href="one-hundred-lines.html">future together</a>.</span></p>
 <p><span class="line">When you told me you loved me, I lied</span><span class="line"><a href="apollo11.html">in the dark</a>. Remember, you told me time was</span><span class="line"><a href="last-passenger.html">a picture of our future</a> together.</span><span class="line">My head is full of fire, <a href="plant.html">my tongue swollen</a>.</span></p>
 </section>